46 Comments
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Joel L's avatar

First of all, this is amazing writing. Bravo.

Also, "I also watched, in secret, the Home episode of The X-Files, the one with the inbred family. It rearranged my nervous system." This episode still lives in the darkest parts of my mind.

G.L DiBiase's avatar

Thank you! For kind words and also knowing that damn episode. I should watch it again as an adult to see was it really that scary.

Joel L's avatar

The words were earned. As far as the episode, I did rewatch it a couple of years ago. It wasn't as scary lol. But it still lives in my mind. Not because it's fantastical. Because it's so real. There are places and people like that, or very close to it.

G.L DiBiase's avatar

Yeah the old horror never hits the same. Now I am in the mood to watch x files again, now I understand more and will not just be scared.

Joel L's avatar

One of the classic alien episodes gave me full on sleep paralysis one night. the light around the edges of the door was blindingly bright… Completely paralyzed, floating up off of the couch and towards the door… When I finally woke up my dog was licking my face because I was screaming. Turned the lights on and didn’t sleep the rest of that night. Sry I am hogging your comment section with X-Files dream lore lol.

G.L DiBiase's avatar

It's more than welcome! Childhood horror is fun! With x files, tales from the cript and many movies. Tremors was my nightmare source for many years, i watched as an adult later and I don't under how did it scare me

Joel L's avatar

Omg Tremors. Michael Gross and Reba McEntire and the wall of guns... "Broke into the wrong god damn rec room didn't you, you bastard!"

Saint-Lazare's avatar

A superb text that got under my skin right away, and still lingers there. You're incredibly talented.

G.L DiBiase's avatar

You are more than too kind!

Charles Saint's avatar

Beautiful!

The houses of our childhood raise us just as much as our parents.

G.L DiBiase's avatar

What a great sentence!

Charles Saint's avatar

Glad you like it - take credit: it’s what I read in your post!

HVR's avatar

That was another amazing piece by you. I felt like I was there and watched it all happen.

Also, Hybrid Theory awakened something in me as well.

G.L DiBiase's avatar

Thank you. And it was a life changing album for a full generation.

Charisse Joy Melegrito's avatar

you painted a picture that feels like i lived there too and darn it, last line hits hard

G.L DiBiase's avatar

Thank you! I really appreciate you even taking time to read.

Alex Jenkin's avatar

Amazing piece G. You tell these stories in such a beautiful and mature way that feels like an invitation to experience and insight rather than just a story. Thanks for sharing as always 😌

G.L DiBiase's avatar

I really appreciate it, thank you. I have never been called mature before.

Alex Jenkin's avatar

Haha yeah you just avoid the whole “now get this!” Aspect that so many people lean into with their personal stories.

It makes them feel more about family, experience, and the normalcy of a struggles that many people face rather than an interesting anecdote.

I hope you still have some of your writing from that time..

G.L DiBiase's avatar

Oh you! I agree, I don't really see my background as some trauma or something bad. It was bad time to time but it's doesn't own me, I own it now and but it into stories.

Ruv Draba's avatar

I like this shift, G. Humour that relieves stress is valuable; humour that teaches is irreplaceable. You would have to go back to 1934-39 in white America to find comparable experiences, and those weren't documented nearly so well as you have.

In Australia, such experiences live in my parents' and late grandparents' memories — it's closer. A diluted version lives in my childhood and that of my late wife. What it illustrates most to me is the cultural difference between treating minor adversity as trauma, and dealing with daily atrocity as absurdity.

This could advance a conversation that the US might very much benefit from. It leaves a legacy for a later generation too — people who already think the 1990s are "vintage" even though the only major technological difference is smartphones.

I think this may be important.

Gustave Deresse's avatar

I read this like a twisted romance.

G.L DiBiase's avatar

With the house?

Gustave Deresse's avatar

Yes... I'm glad it burned too.

G.L DiBiase's avatar

In some ways it really was.

THE DYNAMO PRESS's avatar

I like the way you write.

G.L DiBiase's avatar

I like compliments.

THE DYNAMO PRESS's avatar

Good. That’s settled then.

G.L DiBiase's avatar

Let me know if you want some back.

THE DYNAMO PRESS's avatar

Always, but that wouldn't be fair. I didn't give you enough for you to spare any. Keep it, until next time. If you catch me gushing, then feel free to flick some back at me. But even then, I would have to deserve it. Is that clear?

G.L DiBiase's avatar

I will find the right time and the right amount of a compliment. I keep lurking...

THE DYNAMO PRESS's avatar

Good. And likewise.

Ask a psychopath's avatar

Wow. This article deserves to a be a novel all on its own!

G.L DiBiase's avatar

You're being way too kind!

Ask a psychopath's avatar

It’s well deserved, your piece has heart and soul.

Samara's avatar

wow what an incredible setting. I can see it all clearly. the barn is etched into my mind. you escaping falls in the gutted living room - amazing

G.L DiBiase's avatar

Thank you, I really appreciate you taking time to read.

Samara's avatar

truly excellent

Linda Blatnik's avatar

Beautifully written survival

story. It is the way you turned to writing tho, so it is our blessing that you did.

Thank you for letting us in.

G.L DiBiase's avatar

Thank you for kind words

Zerenner's avatar

I enjoyed this early life pastiche. It's interesting seeing differences in how people grow up in different parts of the world.

Your relationship sounds like that with your father, abusive but almost in a passive aggressive way. Thanks for sharing.

G.L DiBiase's avatar

Thank you. Me and him have clashed many times over there things. By now i have not forgiven him but accept that he sees no wrong. If he ever sees this, he will probably cut me off but fuck it.

David Morris's avatar

But you wrote it! I just enjoyed it.😍

David Morris's avatar

Thank you G.

G.L DiBiase's avatar

No, thank you!

G.L DiBiase's avatar

Thank you. I think trauma is such a complicated thing and word, i choose not to take it as trauma, I don't want my life to be a trauma. Its an adventure.